Personal Attacks

[MysteriousLurker]

I would also add that I have owned a few large adult discussion forums as well. I'm not new to the type issues I am seeing here. I am just not used to personal information being posted so freely on the internet. Even Literotica will ban you for that and most anything goes on Lit. The Personal info being posted here was what prompted me to start this thread. Allowing PI to be posted is a HUGE taboo among webmasters.

[Guitarista]

Yes, it certainly is, because the webmasters do not wish to be sued.

But webmasters of this site and of sites like Womansavers will allow it because without it, the purpose of the site is somewhat defeated.

This site is for reporting problems...and some people are problems.

As long as what you say is true and not made up, it's not libelous, and therefore you can post it.

I don't have a problem with it because I've heard liberal guys piss and moan about all the threats to the "Open Internet" by all the terrible conservatives who would dare compromise their freedom of speech...

...and I have to confess it cracks me up a little to see them get all in a tizzy because of the freedom on a website like this...

"Open Internet"?

Yeah, until we talk about some of YOU!

Then I guess it's not supposed to be so open any more, is it?

Hypocrisy has always been such a good subject for humor, IMO...

I can't help it. Ever since I was in college I could not help but notice that so many "liberal" men who are afraid somebody's tapping their telephone are the biggest chauvinist bullies of all.

Liberal, schmiberal.

What a bunch of fakes.

[Guitarista]

But don't get me wrong, I'm quite liberal, myself, and plan to vote for Obama.

However, I suppose what I'm saying here is that I'd rather date an honest conservative than a dishonest, hypocritical liberal man any day. ( An honest, self-aware liberal man is okay, too...the best man is the independent thinker.)

At least you know he's going to fight fair.

[MysteriousLurker]

I would say that I am mostly liberal in my thinking as well. As far as the issue of liability for facts stated in posts here, that wouldn't be my concern as a webmaster. My concern would be giving a persons name and city on here and then having something happen to them as a result of the information being posted. Say an ex-girlfriend in his hometown sees the post and goes ballistic and murders him. I don't have an issue with the facts of a case being reported but posting someone's first and last name can be very dangerous and I have seen a few instances over the years where it had tragic results. Of course, nothing will change until it happens on one of these type sites but, once it does, it will result in a lawsuit.

In the end, however, all a guy has to do to avoid having his name posted here is simply act like a human being. I guess that's what it all comes back to, isn't it?

From a legal standpoint I am riding the fence on this but from a moral one I am clearly on the side of the women posting here.

[MysteriousLurker]

On a related subject, I am curious as to how real complaints can be distinguished from ones which are posted by trolls or ones which are exagerated. As there is no real verification here (and no way to as far as I can see) I am finding it hard to know what's real and what isn't.

If something untrue is posted then we would slipping into the area where libel is a very real issue. We webmasters are losing much of our legal protections in recent years. The case Viacom has filed against YouTube is a prime example of a webmaster being held liable for content posted by third parties and YouTube is going to lose that suit; it's a foregone conclusion with a conservative Supreme Court. I wonder what this affect that judgment is going to have on other sites similar to this one? It's been my experience that webmasters tend to not make changes until they are sued directly (and then it's too late). Now what I *would* go for is posting their picture instead of their name. This would enable a woman to visual identify them while witholding just enough information to prevent the average joe (or jane) from tracking them down in real life. I would say that posting their screen names on various sites is also a good tactic.

Obviously, I am speaking with my "legal hat" on here. As I stated in the previous post; "If you don't want to be listed here, grow the fuck up and act like a man."

[Guitarista]

All good points, Lurker.

You can sue anybody for anything nowadays...look at some of the tobacco cases and the McDonald's coffee-spilling case.

But I know when I posted here, I was so mad I didn't give a shit whether someone sued me or not, and I said as much.

Besides working in hospital as a nurse, I am a legal nurse consultant and I'm used to being around courts, law firms and lawyers. Besides, I'm used to people...hysterical visitors, etc...threatening to sue, sue, sue! I know that attorneys of integrity screen their cases very well and that most of the bullshit goes into File 13. For me it would have been just another day.

Sometimes you have to take a stand and say what's on your mind, risks and intimidation be damned. Anyhow, any guy whose name is posted on here can come back and refute if he wants to and IF he really has any sort of defense worth posting.

Life is too short to always live in fear.

[Humanity2008]

Basically, people should be responsible for their actions. These Internet warriors who have used it for bad things don't realized that this medium will also expose their misdeeds. I had two judges who could not remove my blog or my Dont Date Him Girl posts of Steven John Krantz. He was given three opportunities to show up in court on a bogus harrassment charge. His lawyer and busy body sister showed up. But the both judges emphasized that Mr. Krantz should show up since he was filing the charge. These wimps backdown when they know that "real people" will not tolerate them. Also the Supreme Court is probably the only place these cases can be taken. I'm sure the Highest Court has more important cases than those involving immarture adults who are being exposed for their cheating ways and socially revolting behavior.

[Guitarista]

Well said, period.

[courtneyiscool]

their actions!

[Guitarista]

I just want to pop in and say thanks to Lurker for starting this thread and for being so nice during the discussion.

I go back to work tomorrow after a few days off, and the next couple of weeks or so are going to be very busy for me. I am glad.

I've had too much time to sit around and think lately. Being busy is good sometimes as long as it does not get out of control.

I am going through a very difficult time. Some philosophers call a time like this the "dark night of the soul"...I guess it applies here.

At 55, I thought all my midlife stuff was pretty much over...wrong.

I know they say, "You are where you're meant to be"...but lately, I often feel so sad and disappointed in how my life has turned out that there are times when I've thought of ending it. It seems pointless and painful during those times.

But don't worry...I have felt this way before. If it becomes overwhelming, I know where to get help and I will go.

I have been to the bottom before. It seems like every time I go there, it's for something different. Some years ago, it was over an illness....also over a relationship, too. It still is, as the illness thing is still a challenge sometimes, but now it is more over just what seems to be the extreme lack of love in my life....and the incredible and sometimes unbelievable unwillingness of those around me to love, and to apologize when they are wrong. To put it simply, nobody ever does. Period.

I have always been one of the hardest working and most idealistic people I know. From the moment I wake up to the moment I end up in bed, tossing and turning and usually not sleeping, I am trying to figure out what to DO.

But I've come to know that sometimes there is NOTHING to be done.

It's just about BEING.

I have apologized to people SO many times. Usually I haven't even done anything particularly wrong.

But I feel such responsibility...for everything, for everyone. It is too much.

So lately, I say little....and I sit with the horrible feelings. I just let them be. I am so sad. I'm so disappointed.

But it's okay to be that way...and to know that this is how you feel.

People who try to escape from these feelings eventually go mad. They become so disconnected with themselves that they cannot possibly connect with anyone else.

I have decided that I do not want to be mad. I would rather be in pain at least part of the time.

The times that we live in are NOT easy times. In fact, no time has ever been. But now, it seems like all the illusions that we once believed in and lived for are being shattered to pieces, and not gently, either.

We can't ride forever on dreams...and we are beginning to find that out.

At least I am.

Life is tough, and money can be hard to get. So it does not make sense to give it away to the ungrateful.

Working for a living is hard, so it does not make sense to let people in who are unappreciative of my efforts.

And loneliness is what you get when you live with these changes.

But surrounding that loneliness is integrity and hope.

When God closes one door, He opens another one.

I have closed many doors this year, ones I do not wish to reopen.

Now I await the new ones that will open.

Thanks for a nice chat, Lurker, and everyone else who showed up on this thread. The thread is thoughtful and civilized. People's hearts and ears were open.

That is good, and sometimes all too rare.

Have a wonderful week, everyone.

I will be back when I can.

Pat

[Humanity2008]

Guitarista, I pray the next few weeks will be good for you. I enjoyed the conversations this thread provided. If you need to communicate, find us here. I know pain and disappoint are hard to work through, especially if you are alone. But, you might be surprised what new people may come into your life.

Love and Peace
JP (AKA Humanity2008)

[Guitarista]

Humanity,

Thanks, that is very kind of you.

I worked some overtime last night and am so tired I can hardly get out of this chair....hence I'm still here.

Check out the movie about marriage under the "marriage" link...it's excellent.

One thing it made clear which is VERY true....self-centered, nasty guys don't care about any woman. But they do care about HOW THEY LOOK...and how stupid we can make them look.

That is about the ONLY thing they care about.

SO LET'S MAKE THEM LOOK STUPID!

lol...

That was certainly how it was with Nick...I could not get his attention by doing anything but posting on here and sending him the link. And by shutting me out he had that coming. Shutting somebody out when they don't agree with you or object to something you do is the next most violent thing to beating them. It's cowardly and cruel and it sucks. And no, I don't agree with the woman who wrote the thing on here about how "you don't need closure". Bullshit. I wonder what emotionally abusive man paid her to write that, to cover his own butt and the butts of his low life friends.

To read the link I posted about him....that was the true extent of concern he ever had for me. How he'd end up looking.

This is one thing you can count on that these types have in common...

AN ENORMOUS EGO.

Well, guess what...other than being exhausted, I'm doin' okay.

Fuck 'em all.

It's good to be moving on.

[catscalw]

[Guitarista]

Ummm...didn't you read my whole post from earlier?

I've got my reasons.

So yeah, fuck 'em all, at least for now.

[catscalw]

crystal