Personal Attacks

[Guitarista]

Gosh, just like Tom Cruise in "A Few Good Men"...

Thanks so much for the empathy (sic)

[catscalw]

Pat,

There are a few of us out here who won't disappear, or take it personally when you say "Fuck-em All."

I don't give two shits about looking cool in these threads. I'm here to support people when they are having a "dark night of the soul" and won't be chased away by a little anger. I have been there, and I know that being given an understanding can help lift us out of the darkness. I've been accused of much worse than you have accused me of, for my trouble, and I don't give two shits about that either.

We have recently lost a member who took her own life. Maybe if there had been someone to keep her engaged, and give her an understanding, she might still be posting here.

When the voices call out from the darknesss in pain and anger, if you give a damn, then you respond. You indicate that you have heard. You witness with them , even when it might not be comfortable or look cool.

So when you say 'Fuck-em All" I say, "Gotcha"

In Magnus Lux Lucis Muneris

[Guitarista]

Sorry, I thought you were being sarcastic.

It's hard to expect much support from ANYONE after what I went through with Nick. It is hard to believe that anyone is still human or has a heart or gives a shit about anyone else on earth besides themselves.

Sorry I misunderstood you. Lately it would seem I trust almost no one.

There are times when trust is nearly impossible...those are the times when you put one foot in front of the other and just carry on with the act. I've always practiced "fake it till you make it" after something like this...it's about all I've got in me.

That's about where it's at for me right now.

The people who have hurt me in my life were always full of one-liners or one-worders...they never elaborated, they shut me out.

That's why they never seem to work with me.

Again, sorry if I misunderstood.

Btw that woman who took her own life....you know, I think I have some idea how she felt just before she did it.

When you're in that frame of mind, it's like anything anyone says to you sounds wrong...it sounds like just another attack, just another criticism. I know what that's like.

You cannot hear any more. The pain is like some huge hallucination that has taken over your life.

That's when you just have to shut off all the feelings and carry on.

One time, long ago, when I was in therapy, the psychiatrist said, "Feelings are not a good guide to reality". They do give us info about what is going on in our heads and we do need to be aware of them and respect them...but they do not necessarily reflect how things really are, around us.

I always try to remember that and it is something that can save your life.

[Guitarista]

I think the bottom line to this whole thing is that, in the end, we have to learn that it isn't necessary to take the idiotic things that other people sometimes do to us too personally.

That can really sound like a totally cold statement until we (or I) realize that there are quite a few really disconnected people in this world who don't know what the fuck they are doing a good portion of the time. To expect them to act rationally or with much care is like expecting a buffalo to eat with a fork.

Expecting a buffalo to eat with a fork is a sure-fire way to be very disappointed because it just isn't going to happen.

You have to be careful in love. The mouth is the biggest liar of any part of the body...talk is cheap, even if it sounds good or if it's what you want to hear. It usually just isn't true.

You have to WATCH what a person does over time, and see how they react to different things and how they handle things to really begin to know them. An Internet chat tells you nothing. It can all be made up. I found that out, the hard way.

For most of my life, I suppose I've been very career-minded...I never dated a lot, and even at my age I have been a bit naive.

But not now....good grief, if I've learned anything from this whole experience, it's how easy it is to be fooled by WORDS.

I'm okay, catsclaw. Not happy, but okay.

Sometimes life is a bitch. But it always changes into something else eventually.

Thanks for your concern and for your trouble....sorry for the misunderstanding.

You know what's ironic is that, just recently, some guy found me on the Internet and wrote me on my MySpace page...my page is mostly for friends and for blogging for Obama, my Presidential candidate, and for poetry, music, fun...stuff like that. But this guy wrote me and started to flirt with me and all this shit...and then said something about "I want you to be my wife" and then started sending me all this bizarrre crap on the chat line that was just unreal...it was so passionate it was funny, like somebody, some romance novel author, made it up.

I reported him to MySpace and they told me they were taking his profile down.

But he kept putting stuff on Yahoo chat. I never answered but it would be there, later, and I'd see it...it was hilarious, all this stuff like, "I can feel you there...I can sense your presence and feel the softness of your skin"..all this crazy shit, it was unreal.

I think that guy was looking for a Green card.

But for awhile, it was like being in Alice in Wonderland...it was like some cosmic Monty Python episode on the Yahoo chat line....like a celestial message saying, "See how ridiculous all of this is? Get over it, already!!!"

I did get a few laughs out of it and that was good for me.

The guy does not write any more. Guess he got discouraged because I did not answer and so he moved on to the next one.

[Zhena]

I beg to disagree. People need to be accountable for their actios... Some of these men are like criminals - they know they can get away with it, and keep on violating women and ruining people's lives. If putting their name on a list or forum warns some woman and spares her some grief, then we are all better for it.

We have lists of sexual offenders... and emotional abuse is violence too.

[Guitarista]

Hey, Zhena, I'm in full agreement with you there! Men do need to be held accountable for their actions, and emotional abuse is like violence.

But what I was talking about was how to get to the state of mind where you are less vulnerable to such men.

That is what I'm trying to do.

then, I will know what I truly want and how to get it better than I do know it now.

Also, this is all very subjective...in some of the more minor cases (and I'm not talking about the kind of thing you see HERE), what constitutes an emotional abuse to one person may not even be a concern to another.

So it is very important to know yourself, and what your needs are....and to know that some people will not be able to meet them.

Also people change over the years, so there's another balancing act.

But yes, all people should be held accountable for their actions. Without that, we would have chaos.

[Zhena]

Hey, I totally agree with you. Mine was more of a response to the first post of that thread.

Zhena

[LoreleiPatrice]

Joyce Sims Palacios, aka justperfectinla, aka Humanity 2008, aka nomorefromla..et al......
Today November 12, 2008, Superior Court of California, County of Orange, Harbor Justice Center, Laguna Hills. Case Number 30-2008 00218270, a Restraining Order to Stop Harassment has been issued against you. The order is based on STALKING. The order is based on CREDIBLE THREAT OF VIOLENCE. You must NOT own, possess, have, buy or try to buy, receive or try to recieve or get a gun while this order is in effect. This order is in effect for a MINIMUM of 3 YEARS from this date.

[Humanity2008]

Lori,

I guess you have taken up the cause of spreading the word throughout this website about the restraining order.Get a life and a man of your own. Steve is a coward who could not talk to me.The restraining order will not affect my life. Apparently Steve and his lawyer never had me served. This seems to fit his lifestyle pattern of lies and being dishonest. Now he has his lawyer doing the same. I never threatened Steve. I think most ladies in this forum would agree that writing about their lowlife ex's is a lot better than shooting them. You have taken up the cause for this lowlife Steven John Krantz instead of World Peace.

Again, after today, as I have done since discovering you on the Internet, a year ago, I will not engage in "Cyber" arguing with you. Again, you don't get it. This site is for those who are cheaters, not a place to bad mouth those who expose them. If Steve was a good man, he would not be on this site and there would not be a Steven John Krantz blog.

www.MoveOnToWhat.blogspot.com

[Humanity2008]

This is the correct site address for the Steven John Krantz blog.

http://moveontowhere.blogspot.com/

[mjplays1973]

for posting your feelings here. I thought I was the only woman stupid enough to be in a "relationship" with a cheating, manipulative, lying, sociopath. After having read some of the posts here in this forum, I see that there are many of us out there who have experienced the same situations with men like this. When someone is so cruel to you, you don't really know what to do. Yes, part of this forum is about venting and closure. However, I truly don't want any other women to suffer like I did. This man turned a healthy happy beautiful woman into someone that I no longer recognized. I now weigh less than 100 pounds. I cannot let other men into my life. My children have suffered, which is the worse part. I know in my heart that if it weren't for my children this man would have caused me to take my own life. Stringing someone along for 3 years with no explanations and just disappearing from our lives whenever he chose is the way he operates. I now believe that there are multiple women out there that he may be doing the same thing with. I want to call his dumb ass out and expose him for what he is. I also plan on sending his mother a letter and telling her what her baby boy has been up to. Sociopaths need to be exposed, and thats the long and short of it.

James Scott Davis could be anywhere in the united states, or anywhere in the world as far as that goes. He is a storm chaser. He travels all over the world. since we have been together he has been in france, germany, switzerland, australia, greece, thailand, shit i can't think of all the countries he visits. Please ya'll be careful because he's a real charmer and he knows how to play you to drain you of everything you have, heart, soul, money, whatever.

[Pinay39]

I cannot speak for everyone else who'se on this site, but for me I want closure and some degree of justice and I'll get it in whatever form I can get. After what my ex put me through, I have a NEED to be heard and to tell my story to move on and heal. NO ONE has the right to horribly manipulate and use anybody...we all have a right to be in a relationship with somebody who tells us the truth.

Pinay39

[MovingOn2009]

Closure is very important to "Moving ON". As a person who was hurt emotionally, it takes more than people hurling cliches to "Move On". Many people as we see from the site, do not value relationships, so it is very easy for THEM to "Move On". These callous people do thier misdeeds and expect Society and those they hurt to approve of their behavior. What's worse are the inconsiderate people who stand by these jerks and lowlifes.

Read my blog. It's an example about hurting and the need for closure. All Steve had to do a year ago was to talk to me face to face. Instead he "sicked' his sister Laurie Krantz and his mistress Lori Reattoire to confront me.

http://moveontowhere.blogspot.com/

[courtneyiscool]

messed up is that? What kind of a guy does that? Wasn't breaking up between you and him, not him and her? It's amazing the kinds of things guys try to get away with. Stay strong. I'm going to check out your blog, too!

[MovingOn2009]

A year ago Steve gave his sister Laurie, my phone numbern and email. A month ago, he gave his mistress, Lori my personal emails. Apparently he faxed her the final restraining order, she scanned it and emailed it to me. Again, I had no idea about the order until she emailed me. Steve and his shady attorney, along with Lori, are scum. This was the same week I flew to Chicago to bury my mother, who was an invalid for several years.